For 1st Ward Alderman, Vote for Ed Tivador

You may have heard that Evanston and Northwestern don’t always have the best relationship (read: they’re mean to us so we pee on them).  Apparently they don’t like people who pay no taxes and we don’t like people who take photos of our red Solo cups and email them around behind our backs.

Seems like the kind of irreconcilable difference that will forever doom town-gown relations, rite? Um. No. Wrong.

Indeed, amidst the long shitstorm of hein coming out of Evanston city government there is one lone voice of sanity. One person shouting the reasonableness from the mountaintops. One man who has the stones to say that maybe the bigger issue is that kids are getting mugged at knifepoint, and not the occasional oral-sex-related-hollering.

That man is Ed Tivador, and he’s running for Alderman in Evanston’s first ward.

Now I know at this point you’re probably thinking, “Wait, but you said earlier that he’s sane. Now you’re saying he’s running for Evanston government? I’m confused.” But it’s true! He’s a real live sane person and a real live candidate for Alderman!

Ed probably also liked Macklemore before Thrift Shop.

Don’t believe us? That’s fair, we’re pretty damn unreliable. But just look what Tivador said about ways to promote student safety in off-campus drinking by creating a safe haven program with neighbors willing to help students: “I want to be the neighborhood person that says … ‘Are you okay? What is your cell phone number? Can I call a friend?’”

As in, like, focusing on making sure that students who drink have resources to be safe rather than on how best to punish students for committing The Sin of alcoholing. But wait, there’s more! Eddy T on the brothel law? More pure sanity: “As long as the dwelling is safe and fit for the number of people, the fact that they are not related should not be relevant.”

Seems as if he’s speaking as someone who has interacted with a student at some point in his life, right? But it gets better! Here’s my buddy Ed on whether more lighting near places where The Muggers like to attack The Students is a good idea: “Why are we putting lighting? So it’s safe for kids, safe for students, safe for teachers.”

Woah. Your brain is probably doing this right now. Not once in any of his interviews does he describe shutting down all fun places in Evanston as a top city priority. He uses words like “residents” to describe NU students, as opposed to “mooching fuckfaces,” which is the official Evanston city government term.

Clearly, this bro belongs on the city council. And in most Aldermen elections, less than 1,000 people tend to vote. So we just make all 8,000 NU students vote and then Tivador wins by like a trillion, rite? WRONG AGAIN.

Evanston did this mean gerrymandering thing so that Northwestern students aren’t all in the same ward. This means only students who live on South Campus or immediately off campus get to vote for Tiv-daddy.

So please, freshmen living in Allison, get off your hungover butts and fill out your voter registration forms by Tuesday, March 12. Then, sorority girl coming back from Blom, get to the polls literally anytime between March 25 and April 6 and vote for Eddy. Or, member of Ski Team who was too lazy to take advantage of early voting, go to your polling place on April 9th instead.

Please. The rest of us are counting on those with the privilege of voting in this race to show Evanston that we actually do give a shit and that we really would like an Alderman who doesn’t involuntarily vomit upon seeing the Arch.

Do your duty, kids. Put Ed Tivador on the city council.

(Note: This represents the views of the Sherman Ave editorial board and also anyone smart so if you disagree haha ur stupid!!!)

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