10 Reasons New York Fashion Week is Really, Really Drunk

We know they’re lightweights, but come ON. Here’s why we suspect NYFW is sloshed out of its mind.

1. Because hoodie weather is PERFECT for a sleeveless crossword puzzle.

22-Across is more than just a waist measurement.

2. Because He-Man wore white after Labor Day.

Seriously though, fucking come on

3. Because someone took inspiration from my brother on Desperately-Need-To-Do-Laundry Day.

I love Goodwill’s new clothing line!

4. Because with enough alcohol, the Na’avi turn into leaf magnets.

Avatar is a bad movie.

5. Because this is the moment little Carly graduated from duct-tape bookmarks to duct-tape dresses. 

ABC amirite?!

6. Because you have to be really, really drunk to put Keds on a lampshade.

I mean, I still would.

7. Because the Tin Man, Big Bird, and John Travolta appear to have procreated.

Sexual Fantasies Gone Wrong, Vol. XXIV

8. Because WATCH OUT IT’S THE WHOMPING WILLOW

Or a Truffula Tree on a serious trip.

9. Because from now on, the world will waste no more time pondering whether monks have nipples.

Medieval Wardrobe Malfunction

10. Because how else would someone think to put dominoes on a tennis court?

WHERE IS YOUR VAGINA