12 Reasons Why Going to School Somewhere Cold is Awesome

12 Nov

1. Never having to slather your body in the ectoplasmic goo known as sunscreen

2. When you inevitably put on Freshman 15, no one will notice

This woman actually weighs 190 lbs

This woman actually weighs 190 lbs

3. Not only will no one notice, but once the clothes come off, additional body fat is considered desirable in a potential mate since it provides more warmth

mmmm Jabba, I’d much rather see you in that skimpy gold bikini

mmmm Jabba, I’d much rather see you in that skimpy gold bikini

4. Delicious hot drinks—Hot chocolate, warm apple cider, either of the aforementioned drinks infused with schnapps. A PSL just CANNOT taste as good on the sweltering beachside campus of University of Hawaii. Ugh.

5. Snow makes every campus look beautiful and Hogwarts-y

6. “Uh, I swear it’s usually bigger, it’s, uh, just kind of cold out” is always a valid excuse.

7. Snow shoeing, snow balls fights, snow angels—you will not do any of these because you will be stuck in the library studying for midterms, but they sure sound fun!

8. What’s that? The roads are covered in thick sheets of ice, causing dozens of accidents and endangering lives? All I heard was SNOW DAY NO SCHOOL!!!!


9. Not ever having to shave your legs or any other parts sweaters

10. Shouting “Winter is Coming!” is always relevant

11. It’s ALWAYS acceptable to wear blankets, either of the cotton or of the beer variety

12. Walking to class as gale force 7 winds whip pellets of hail into your face, each one stinging sharply as a bullet, the air so cold that your whole body aches and it hurts to breathe in must build character or something, otherwise we’d all go to school in Southern California, right? Right??

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