Psych Major Loses 45 Friends in Quest for 30 Survey Responses

4 Dec

Blackwell, patiently awaiting her 30th respondent. (via vipdictionary.com)

EVANSTON, Ill. — Northwestern University junior Psychology major Ramona Blackwell admitted in a press conference this morning that she has shattered 45 once-healthy friendships since she began seeking respondents for a survey last Monday.

The survey, created as an assignment for her Research Methods class, requires 30 respondents, making it all the more impressive that her attempt to garner responses resulted in cutting ties with a much higher number of close friends and acquaintances.

“It’s certainly a disappointment,” said Blackwell. “I would have thought it would be okay to just post about it a few times a day, because people should understand class requirements.”

“Even my parents unfriended me,” added Blackwell.

As of press time, Blackwell had gotten the requisite number of responses for her survey, but had sent out an email over four student group listservs bearing the subject line, “NEED HELP USING QUALTRIX PLEASE HELP ME I WILL DO ANYTHING.”

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