Student Who Spent Friday Night in Library Unaware That “These Are the Days”

24 Feb
The student in question, enjoying the best years of his life.

The student in question, enjoying the best years of his life.

EVANSTON, IL – Reports from Mudd Library have confirmed that the engineer hard at work this past Friday night has not yet figured out that his college years will, by default, be remembered as the highlight of his youth.  The student is reportedly oblivious to the fact that in 20 years his middle-aged self will frequently reminisce about his years in college, murmuring to himself, “Those were the days,” while he gazes wistfully out the window of his office building.

The aging senior manager will then resignedly sigh as he rests his head on his hand and recalls how he used to toss the ol’ Frisbee with “the guys” on the quad before a weekend of “hittin’ the sauce”, an activity that made up less than .001% of his college career.

Through continued monitoring of the situation, it was confirmed that the student, who is not currently taking any classes “just for himself,” is unaware that in the coming decades these years of college will be retrospectively deemed the best years of his life.  Speculation arose that the engineer’s current lifestyle—in which most of each day is consumed by either studying or browsing the internet—is going to put quite a bit of pressure on his 40-year-old self down the road to heavily romanticize his college experience.

As of 1:00 in the morning on Friday night, the student—who had just opened and immediately closed Facebook for the sixth time in less than 2 minutes—was neither enjoying nor even acknowledging the unprecedented level of freedom so unique to this point in his life.  Multiple sources confirmed that he was certainly not taking advantage of the extremely rare situation of having thousands—“literally thousands!” his dad reported—of attractive, intelligent people his age right in front of him.

“Sometimes I just sit and think about the wild times I had back then.  Ahhh, to have your whole life in front of you…man, what I wouldn’t give, ya know, Steve?” the engineer would say two decades down the road while chatting with a coworker by the communal water cooler. “Kids these days just don’t know how good they have it.”

At press time it had been reported that the student’s plans to attend a party next weekend would function as his lone anecdote about wild college parties for the next twenty years, often being introduced into conversations by the phrase “Man, the ragers we used to throw…”

10 Responses to “Student Who Spent Friday Night in Library Unaware That “These Are the Days””

  1. ajax google apis March 8, 2014 at 11:07 am #

    Hurrah! At last I got a blog from where I know how to really get helpful data concerning my study and knowledge.

  2. old abandoned mansions for sale oakville March 28, 2014 at 11:09 pm #

    I every time used to study paragraph in news papers but now as I am a user of net
    thus from now I am using net for articles or reviews, thanks to web.

  3. pay day express March 31, 2014 at 9:48 pm #

    Write more, thats all I have to say. Literally, it seems as though
    you relied on the video to make your point. You definitely know what youre talking about,
    why throw away your intelligence on just posting videos
    to your weblog when you could be giving us something enlightening to read?

  4. April 1, 2014 at 12:14 pm #

    What’s up to every one, for the reason tthat I am truly eager of reading
    this blog’s post to be updated regularly. It includess fastidious stuff.

  5. foot reflexology techniques Calgary SW April 2, 2014 at 2:08 am #

    Good info. Lucky me I discovered your site by chance (stumbleupon).
    I have book-marked it for later!

  6. service manual whirlpool duet washer April 13, 2014 at 5:48 pm #

    I have observed that wise real estate agents just about everywhere are starting to warm up
    to FSBO Marketing. They are acknowledging that it’s in
    addition to placing a poster in the front place. It’s really pertaining to
    building connections with these traders who later will become buyers.

    So, when you give your time and effort to assisting these vendors go
    it alone — the “Law associated with Reciprocity” kicks in.

    Thanks for your blog post.

  7. Ρeople can easily mistake the condition for the flu, ingrown hairs,
    or other simple ailments. But what if high ƅlood pressure and
    heart disease isn’t caused by bacteria, but bʏ a virus.
    Taking medicɑtion duriոg the herpes outbreak can Һelp speed up the healinǥ process.

  8. flat roof repair Calgary April 13, 2014 at 8:24 pm #

    There’s certainly a great deal to know about this issue.
    I really like all of the points you have made.

  9. Nu Skin reviews April 14, 2014 at 2:33 am #

    Hello! Do you use Twitter? I’d like to follow
    you if that would be ok. I’m absolutely enjoying your blog and look forward to new posts.

  10. Visalus April 27, 2014 at 11:23 pm #

    Everything is very open with a clear explanation
    of the challenges. It was really informative.
    Your site is very helpful. Many thanks for sharing!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: