EVANSTON, Il. – On Thursday night, shortly after Mayfest organizers announced that Chance The Rapper would be the daytime headliner at Dillo Day, your roommate excitedly declared that he met Chance at a party last summer. According to your roommate, the party was hosted by his high school buddy’s second-cousin at an apartment in the Southside of Chicago in late July.
Your roommate claims to have recognized the 20 year-old rapper immediately because he had been a fan of him “forever,” even before the release of his first mixtape, #10Day. Furthermore, your roommate “swears to fucking god” that he smoked a massive blunt with him outside and listened to him free-style rap.
When asked for comment, your roommate giddily recounted his life-defining experience:
“I approached Chance when he walked outside for a cigarette. After some prodding, he agreed to smoke my weed with me. After we smoked, he started talking about how hot my girlfriend was by using improvised rap lyrics. He ended up having sex with her later that night – hahaha that guy is crazy! It was awesome!”
Sources could not confirm the size of the blunt or the actual occurrence of your roommate’s interaction with the semi-famous musician. However, sources have confirmed that your roommate will blast Chance the Rapper’s 3 most popular songs repeatedly on his speakers and tell the same exact story to everyone he sees for the next two months.
Word on the street is that Chance is going to apply to be a writer for Sherman Ave. But you didn’t hear that from us.