Freshman Guide: Breaking Up with Your High School Significant Other

It’s the most wonderful time of the year! The fall semester is coming to a close, Christmas is approaching, and you are turning yourself into one giant sweater. However, with the holiday season comes another important annual occurrence: the end of your high school relationship. Yes, just as Kris Kringle shimmies down your chimney to give you a new iPhone and PS4 (PS4, MOM, NOT PS3. JESUS.), you similarly will wriggle your way out the relationship that was doomed to eventual failure over nine months ago when admission letters came out.

While breaking up is never an easy thing to do, it does not have to be an entirely bad experience. That’s why we here at Sherman Ave have gotten together to bring you the five best tips for breaking up with your significant other:

World Cup: Alex Morgan in Bodypaint

GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAALLLLLL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Guys. Alex Morgan posed without any clothing (NSFW-ish kinda maybe? Idk how much of a Tisdahl your boss is). All she has on is body paint. Please cancel the rest of your day immediately.

See, Alex Morgan is actually perfect. In addition to being a star women’s soccer player, adorable butterfly, and lovely human being, Alex is also my future wife. I expect she’ll propose to me NU-style on the medal stand at the London Olympics. After she wins all the gold medals.