Welp, it’s getting to be about that time again. Just as you start to cram for finals and mentally prepare yourself for a few all-nighters, Northwestern decides to saddle you with your quarterly Course and Teacher Evaluations. (The second C stands for “Cooch”, or so my roommate tells me). So to use as you please, here are your top five formats to help you get through CTECs so you can start worrying about things that matter, like New Years plans.
5. The Pshhh
Earlier this summer, Sherman Ave editors Ross Packingham and Sir Edward Twattingworth III interviewed Psychology professor and Allison Hall live-in Renee Engeln-Maddox at Sherman Ave Headquarters. If any cultural references seem slightly out of date, it’s because that’s what happens when we decide to wait to publish interviews for three months due to reasons.
Renee, shortly after realizing what a terrible, terrible mistake it was to agree to an interview with us.
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Packingham: We noticed you didn’t bring your dog to his interview… Is he gonna make it, or…?
Renee: He’s visiting Grandma right now, actually.
Twattingworth: Well, all of our questions were for him, soooo…
Renee: Oh, do you want me to leave? He doesn’t really know many words, though. Plus he would get dog hair all over your apartment.
Packingham: Probably not the worst thing this apartment has been through.
Twattingworth: This is actually the cleanest it’s looked in weeks.
Renee: This is… Um. You cleaned?
Twattingworth: A lot.
Renee [pointing to where we stashed the beer pong cups]: Meaning you stashed the beer pong cups in a row?
Twattingworth: Well that cup used to be over here.
Packingham: Do you watch Game of Thrones?
Renee: Mhm, I unfortunately got really excited about the new season and I yelled to my Psychopathology class, Continue reading
Oh, you just found out you were assigned to Allison Hall for your freshman year? Wellll then, CONGRATULATIONS YOU JUST WON. EVERYTHING.
For starters, this place is a hotel. Seriously. Some witty, clever students have even taken to calling it… Continue reading
The Sherman Ave Editors (Evander Jones, Ross Packingham and Sir Edward Twattingworth III) sat down with Northwestern University President Morty Schapiro for an interview. Why he agreed to let us do this, we may never know, but we sure are happy he did.
“I’m allergic to cats.”
Packingham: If you could make a drink called “The Morty,” what would it entail?
Morty: Oh man. Like an alcoholic drink?
Twattingworth: Wow, interesting that your mind went there.
Morty: Yeah… Well, you know when I drink, like last night–this is really exciting–but one-third orange juice, two-thirds Perrier.
Packingham: Perrier? Is that vodka? Or rum?
Morty: And they have to give me this much wine so I can hold it to pretend I’ll drink it, but I’m not a wine drinker. I like beer when I have Asian food. I like Thai beer, or Japanese beer or something.
Packingham: Like a Budweiser?
Morty: I don’t think I’ve ever had one of those. So I’m not big on like American Continue reading
By now, if you Facebook stalk me to the extent I expect, you know that something magical happened in Paris this past spring break. Something greater than Florida State’s Cinderella run to the Sweet Sixteen. Something even greater than Whoopi Goldberg telling Donald Trump to STFU. Something outside of my wildest dreams. I’m referring, of course, to the time I spent with Morty “The Fucking Legend” Schapiro in the City of Lights.
It seemed like a regular Parisian afternoon. I guess that’s how these things usually go. I was walking with my parents up to the Louvre after having lunch at a café in the Tuilleries. Out of the corner of my eye I saw a flash of purple.
Sherman Ave 