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Tag Archives: Amanda Bynes

We Made Inspirational Posters Out Of Amanda Bynes Tweets

17 Jul

So we thought it would be fun to take Amanda Bynes’ absurd tweets as far out of context as we possibly could.  Granted, her Twitter feed isn’t really any sort of “context,” rather a horrid shitshow of surgery and Drake, but we went for it anyway.  We hope you derive as much joy from making fun of Amanda Bynes as we do.

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Screen Shot 2013-07-17 at 7.30.26 PM Continue reading

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27 Thoughts That Go Through the Mind of a College Student on Summer Break (Almost) Every Day

29 Jun
Nothing goes with a cigarette quite like a coronarita and VD.

Nothing goes with a cigarette quite like a coronarita and the threat of VD.

1. “I wonder how many times I’ll have to scan this same file.”

2. “No, no – I didn’t come here for a learning experience, I came here to fetch your coffee and pretend to care about your stories.”

3. “What is it even like to be outside during the day?”

4. “New puppy post on Buzzfeed? Sorry responsibilities, you’ll have to wait.”

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The Netflix Treatment: Which Other Shows Should Be Resurrected?

29 May

Arrested Development caused more of an uproar this weekend than an Apache-themed party at the Arizona capitol building, making every social media account the dumping ground for half-assed references to the banana stands and one-armed men. It’s nice to know that everyone can spoil the fun at the same time! Binge-watching is the new hip thing like moms in bell-bottom jeans or Hillary Duff’s clothing line at Kohl’s. It’s has the fun addictive properties of cocaine and the similar benefits of alienation from friends.

With Ronald Reagan out of the White House and his crack battle long over, there’s no stopping this infectious streaming disease. Plus Barry dug the shit out Continue reading

Amanda Bynes: Master Troll

28 May
Troll

Troll

Do you ever think about the celebrity infatuation that exists in this county?

The generous amount of on-air time spent covering the Hollywood aristocracy would make any publicity-seeking radical weep into their manifestos. This is especially true with the celebrity meltdown, the fall from grace which has become a parody of itself. The drugs, the denials, the arrests, it has all become so cliché that you need to spice it up nowadays if you want attention (e.g. with racism, animal abuse, revanchism, etc.).

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Support the Sherman Ave Foundation to Save Amanda Bynes!

23 Mar
Amanda, please.

Amanda, please.

To our esteemed readers:

With winter quarter having finally been KILLED WITH FIRE, you can all kick back and enjoy a worry-free life, right?  Wrong.  So wrong.  Each and every one of you should be very worried, for American treasure and voice of a generation Amanda Bynes is in need of some serious fixing.  Not some minor tweaking, like your self-esteem as a Northwestern student or season one of Parks and Rec; no, this is an all-hands-on-deck fiasco, like Will.i.am. or Cher’s Twitter.  A new Greatest Generation must rise to confront this challenge if we are to save Amanda from her tailspin and discover who the real Moody is.

As you are all aware, our Amanda’s troubles have been building for some time now.  In retrospect, her “retirement” from acting in her early twenties should have been a red flag, but the idea of being 24 and retired is so fucking cool that no one really bothered to question it.  Amanda had also seemed to be so genuinely talented and likable, like post-Cady Heron and pre-Herbie: Fully Loaded-era Lindsay Lohan, that she could do no wrong; her popularity, much like Amber’s, simply could not be denied.

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