Freshman Launches “March Through Her Arch” To Convince Prospies To Commit To NU

Earlier this week, freshman Hailey Sutten reported an estimated 2000 male students from the class of 2018 have pledged to apply to Northwestern early decision due to  her sexual generosity. Sutten, a Biology major with a focus in anatomy, created the prospective student program March through Her Arch earlier this month in hopes of recruiting students who are aroused, yet curious, at the idea of attending Northwestern.