#YOPO
Yesterday marked a historic day for the Catholic Church, as Cardinal Jorge Mario Bergoglio of Argentina—now known as Pope Francis I—was selected to be the 266th leader of the Catholic Church. In a stroke of good luck, Sherman Ave correspondent Prince Giblets was fortunate enough to chat with the recently elected Pontifex Maximus only moments after he spoke for the first time at the Vatican. What did His Holiness have to say? You’ll have to keep reading to find out:
His Greatness, doing his best Brian Kelly impression.
MIAMI — According to witnesses at the Pearly Gate, His Almighty was reportedly overheard giggling fervently as the final seconds ticked down on Notre Dame’s crushing 42-14 NCAA BCS Championship defeat.
God, in all his righteous omniscience and everlasting mercy, had a really good chuckle as Nick Saban’s Alabama Crimson Tide rolled easily to their third national championship in four seasons. The loss, which signifies that maybe there truly is a Higher Power watching over us all to benevolently protect His helpless flock from the pompous self-aggrandizement and arrogant delusion that characterize Notre Dame football fans, has sent shockwaves across the theological community.
Sherman Ave 