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Tag Archives: horror

Crazed Murderer Relieved That You Didn’t Check Behind Shower Curtain

28 Apr
(via Elite Linens)

(via Elite Linens)

After a recent trip to the bathroom where you neglected to check behind the shower curtains because for once you decided not to let paranoia control you, the crazed murderer who has spent hours hiding out in your shower stall breathed a sigh of relief.

“For a moment, I thought you were going to whip open the curtains to check for me,” crazed murderer Joseph Walter Harris said as he cradled Continue reading

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A Guide to August Blockbusters Based Solely On The Movie Posters

31 Jul

Summer is, by far, the best season for movies.  After all, can you think of a better way to enjoy sunny, beautiful weather than by sitting in a dark room for several hours while watching other people doing things on a giant screen? No, you can’t! Since I live in LA — and thus know more about movies than anybody else in the world — I figured I would save you the trouble of researching what movies you will see this August by providing you with a brief premise for each of the big blockbusters coming soon to a masturbation den theater near you! While I haven’t actually seen any of these movies, I HAVE seen their posters, and so I can totally give a 100% accurate synopsis. Continue reading