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Tag Archives: Houston Rockets

Predicting the NBA Season In Haikus

29 Oct
LeBron's mom sleeps with// 14 different Heat players// BronBron blames Cleveland.

LeBron’s mom sleeps with// 14 different Heat players// BronBron blames Cleveland.

With the new NBA season up us, and as the most trusted name in expert professional basketball analysis and predictions on the Web today, we decided to give you a heads up about how this season will go. Check out how the conference standings will look come May, alongside some expertly crafted haikus because of course. Continue reading

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Air Bud Signs With Houston Red Rockets

3 Apr
Three players on the Red Rockets, scouring the court to make sure there's no dogshit.

Three players on the Red Rockets, scouring the court to make sure there’s no dogshit.

HOUSTON – Red Rockets General Manager Daryl Morey announced today that a final agreement had been reached with golden retriever and notorious alcoholic-clown-duper Buddy, nicknamed “Air Bud.”  The team has signed the animal to a 3-year contract, compensating him with 15 million dollars a year, in addition to ample amounts of Alpo and catshit.

The decision to bring on Air Bud comes at an opportune moment for the Red Rockets; sitting in mediocrity at 7th place in the Western conference, the team needs rejuvenation.  Morey hopes that the addition of an all-star canine will rejuvenate the team and put them in a stronger standing for the playoff race. Continue reading