New Roommate From Westchester Won’t Shut Up About New York Bagels; Pizza

Moorehead, expounding further upon his top 5 all-time shmears

SAINT PAUL, MN — Macalester College freshman and Westchester County native James Moorehead will not shut up about the elite nature of New York City’s bagels or pizza, sources report.

“I don’t know, there’s something about a New York City bagel that you just can’t find anywhere else,” complained a wary Moorehead at his local Einstein Bros Bagels.  Added the Bedford native, “I think it has to do with the water or something.”