EVANSTON, Il. – The news that Riccardo Muti, music director of the Chicago Symphony Orchestra, was tabbed as this year’s commencement speaker for Northwestern University was met with overwhelming excitement on Thursday by the large contingent of senior citizens in the Class of 2014.
“I’m a pretty a typical Northwestern student. I have seven grandchildren, reading glasses, and a hip replacement,” explained eighty-five year-old Weinberg senior Wilfred O. Rumpelstein. “So I think I speak for all of my classmates when I say that a classical music director is kind of a dream selection for the speaker that will wrap up my college experience.”
Campus officials explained that the decision was an easy one. “We’re very happy with the selection of Riccardo Muti as this year’s commencement speaker,” said one campus official on Thursday. “We were looking for someone who represented the interests of the outgoing class and a seventy-two year old, Italian classical music conductor seemed like the obvious choice.”
Five College Football Bowl Games That Need New Names
27 DecEvery year between the end of the college football season and the national championship game we’re forced to endure a series of overly-sponsored match-ups by slightly-better-than-average football squads. They are given a shot at eternal glory by conquering opponents in bowl games whose names leave even the most experienced commentators tongue tied. So, whether we’re fans of the sport, fans of a team in the game, or someone who happens to be watching television over this holiday season, bowl games like the “Franklin American Mortgage Music City Bowl” often leave us with an overwhelming sense of confusion as to why teams are playing and who is watching. Here are five bowl games whose names stand out as horribly mis-matched with the teams competing in them:
Continue reading →
Tags: A Bowl Game, Advocare V100 Bowl, Ames, Animal Kingdom, Arizona, Arkansas State, Bad Bowl Names, Ball State, Boise, Boise State, bong, Boston College, bowl games, Bowl Schedule, Bowl Season, Busch Light, Chicago Bears, college, college football, Commentators, Corporate Sponsors, Domain hosting, English, euphemism, football, Franklin American Mortgage Music City Bowl, Gamecocks, genitalia, Glory, GoDaddy Bowl, GoDaddy.com, Hotel chain, Iowa, Kansas City, Kathmandu, Make-A-Wish Foundation, Matchups, Meal Plan, Minnesota, Mountaineering, National Championship Game, Nepal, New Era, New Era Pinstripe Bowl, New Jersey, Northwestern, Notre Dame, Oregon State, Pinstripe Bowl, Pit Stop, Plank of wood, Pre-marital sex, Richard Nixon, road trip, Run Defense, Rutgers, Saturn, season, Sheraton, Sheraton Hawaii Bowl, South Carolina, Sponsors, state, State university, Syracuse, Texas Bowl, The Destroyer, The Road Trip Pit Stop Bowl, University, World War II veteran, Yankee Stadium, Your Grandpa's Favorite Bowl